Love is Complicated
by Harmony201
Summary: The first word is Love. Love is messy, fun, surprising, and worth it. Evan 'Buck' Buckley is not good at love and Edmundo 'Eddie' Diaz has a past with love he does not want to think about. Buck realizes his love for Eddie is not just the friendship caring about the other person kind of love, but more. Love is weird, wild, and made. Love is complicated especially when you love your
1. Chapter 1

Love is complicated. Everyone knows that. Even when it seems simple- those two people love each other and they are so happy- it is not. There is a whole scientific reason for love with brain chemicals and for some science is very not simple. Even if you ignore the science of love and believe love has to do with faith, fate, and soulmates and you wish annoying science would stop ruining the pure joy get from love, love is still not simple. It is messy and complicated. It has different experiences for different people and each day brings up varied emotions. Love is a baby with a switchblade. It is cute, maybe funny depending on someone's kind of comedy, surprising- Why would that baby have a switchblade?! Who gave that baby a blade?!- and obviously dangerous. Now do not worry (Meaning worry, a baby has a blade!), but the baby will be fine. The baby cannot hurt itself, because of science or whatever. It can hurt you though. There are a few options to deal with this murderous baby: get hurt, take the knife, or hug the baby and hope you do not get stabbed. The universe or whatever god you believe in gave you those options so roll with it. You cannot walk away. Well yes, you can- another option. You cannot go through life without seeing the baby with a switchblade at least once, even if you hate the baby. Who wouldn't want to see a baby with a switchblade at least once? It could be cool and badass IF you knew the baby was safe. The point is love is a messy complicated baby with a switchblade. Liking someone? Just as bad, maybe a puppy with a butter knife.

They can surprise you, especially when you are a twenty-six-year-old firefighter named Evan Buckley but goes by Buck and you have never really been good at love or like because you do not fully understand either. You are fluent in sexual attraction, knowing you want to see another person naked and get tired of old faces. Until you realize there is something better than that toxic addictive behavior. Buck 1.0 is gone because he sucks and Buck 2.0 is happy. He has his first serious relationship and a glimpse of a better life with Abby. Until she "dumps" your ass to travel the world and truly live her life. You are supportive at first, thinking she will come back, then sadly and slowly you realize it is over. She is having too much fun with Italian guys to have more than a five-minute conversation with you. So you are alone again, but you know better now. You have tasted the sweet peach of dating and will not go back to hookups in bar bathrooms. Dating is back on the table and even though it is not like it was with Abby you are still trying. A wise man once said that kind of love, that real special once you have had it you rather die than lose it kind, is made. You keep trying, keeping your eyes open for the person to make that kind of love with. When you are blinded though and the person you are supposed to make it with, your partner, your soulmate, is right in front of you, always around you, so close to you it is impossible to see them romantically and as more than just someone you respect and care about, you don't believe it. Until the universe or whatever god you believe in makes you believe. You are in love with Eddie Diaz, your partner, best friend, firefighter family member. And you just don't know it, until you do.


	2. Chapter 2

The first call of a twelve-hour shift was a twin allergic reaction in the park. One of the identical eight-year-old brunette boys walked away from his brother, mother, and five-year-old sister towards a large water fountain while the other three watched a clown make balloon animals for children. He wandered looking at his surrounding attentively, wanting to see everything at once. The boy practically skipped to the white stone fountain. He quickly poked his right hand in the cool water. He smiled at the feeling then yanked it out, the water splashing slightly. The boy leaned forward, his heels leaving the ground and his face got closer to the water. His palms shined a light red as he squeezed the stone harder to stop himself from falling in. He pulled back after a small scare of almost falling in. His grin widens as he stared at the pennies glistening in the water from the sunlight. The sparkling pennies held his attention for a few more seconds then a faint smell grabbed it. He turned his head and saw a golden brown cookie on a white napkin. It was so big. It was a perfect circle sitting in the sun; its smell whirling around his nose. The cookie looked like it had steam coming off it. The boy looked around and he noticed the cookie was alone. He quickly jumped over to it and slowly picked it up. The cookie left a buttery stain on the paper napkin. The smell got stronger and his need to eat it got bigger.

The cookie was centimeters away from his mouth when he heard his name. He turned toward the call's direction. His brother ran up to him stopping him from taking a bite into the cookie.

"What are you doing?" His brother asked. His brother looked at the cookie then frowned. "Where did you get that?" He asked with anger in his tone.

"I found it!" The boy quickly barked. His brother reached for the cookie and the boy stepped back. "It's mine!"

"Share Devin!" His brother whined. Devin shook his head and his brother reached for the cookie again. "I'll tell mom!" His brother immediately threatened.

Devin gave his brother an upset stare but nodded before his brother called for their mom. Something he knew he would only have another second if he didn't agree. Devin looked at the cookie and released a light sigh. The large cookie, just for him, he thought was the greatest gift ever. Now it was a medium-size cookie that he had to share with his brother. He had to share everything and he would say it sucks like his older brother would, but his brother would tell and he'd get in trouble. He sighed again as his brother looked between him and the cookie. Devin broke the cookie down the middle. It broke unevenly and he hand the small piece to his brother.

"There!" Devin snapped as he handed it to him.

"Thanks," his brother gleefully smiled looking at his piece of the cookie. His grin went ear to ear as he took a large bite of the soft cookie.

Devin bit his cookie still watching his brother. His brother devoured his cookie with crumbs falling on his red t-shirt. Devin was slower with his eating lightly smiling at the fact his brother had to watch him enjoy the rest of his cookie. His smile disappeared and his grip on the cookie loosen enough for it to fall to the ground. He tried to take a breath when he felt his throat tighten. Devin's eyes widened as he tried to take another breath and scream in pain. He gasped for air but felt none. He looked at his brother and realized he was doing the same. Devin kept gasping as his eyes went up to the shining blue sky. Both boys fell to the ground at almost the same time.

There was a shriek that got the crowd around the clown's attention. The commotion got the mother's attention. She looked towards the shriek and saw two boys laying on the ground. She looked closer and gasped. She quickly grabbed her daughter swinging her on her hip and ran.

"David! Devin!" she screamed. The girl in her arms held on tight to her orange balloon dog. "Help!" She got to them in seconds and dropped to her knees. A small crowd formed as people came to see what was happening. "Someone call 9-1-1!" the mother cried.

Buck hopped out of the firetruck and caught up behind Eddie. "I just don't understand," he said continuing the discussion they were having earlier.

"That's not new," Hen responded rushing passed them with a black medical bag and Chimney behind her. Buck looked at her then at Eddie. Eddie gave a short shrug then followed the others. Hen bent down in front of Devin. "Allergic reaction," she announced.

"EpiPen," Chimney told her pulling two out of his black medical bag. He handed her on and they stabbed one in each boy's arm. The boys' redding faces and bloating bodies ceased until they turned black to normal. Both boys took in a big gasp for air and sat up. The bystanders clapped and the boys' mother released a cry and sigh of relief.

"Did you boys get bitten by anything? Touch a plant? Eat something-" the boys froze for a second and stared at each other. The guilt covered their whole bodies. Hen instantly noticed and stopped talking. "What did you eat?" she asked. Both boys were silent but their facial expressions said enough.

"This," Eddie chimed in picking up part of a cookie. He put it up to his nose and sniffed it. "Peanut Butter."

Hen looked back at the boys with a raised eyebrow.

The mother looked at her sons shocked. "You're allergic to peanuts." She sighed, shaking her head. "Thank you all," she said to them.

When they were back in the station, they loosen up a little. They were half ready for another call at any second and a half feeling relaxed between calls. Eddie hopped out of the firetruck. He started up the stairs with Buck not far behind.

"Okay, so now can you explain?" Buck asked Eddie. He reached the top of the stairs and followed him towards the couches.

Eddie released a short and low sigh. He dropped down in a dark gray seat and shrugged again. Eddie thought his discussion was over and he cannot help but be a little annoyed that Buck won't just drop this. He doesn't know why Buck cares so much about it, but whatever the reason he was the wrong person to ask about this. "It's just like that," he answered nonchalantly, trying not to show any frustration.

"You're still talking about this," Bobby chimed in at the tip of the stairs. His interaction cut off Buck's response. Eddie looked back at him as he walked into the kitchen. Bobby was clearly over this discussion too. Eddie didn't think he was listening. He probably wasn't but Buck's loud and persistent enough voice must have pushed its way into Bobby's ears and brain. Eddie wanted to add to Bobby's comment and say how much of a waste of time this conversation was but before he could another opinion was expressed.

Hen came up the stairs shortly after Bobby. She walked over to Eddie and Buck in the sitting area. He sat down across from the two, sitting with her legs slightly crossed on the seat, her left thigh over her right foot. She left Chimney to straighten up and restock the ambulance. "What are you even talking about?" Hen questioned toward Buck. Buck had been going on about whatever this was since they walked into start their shift and she had no idea what he was going on about.

Buck looked from Bobby to Hen with a clueless expression. It was that wonder raised eyebrow look that almost everyone in his life has seen more than ten times. Sometimes his face naturally made the expression out of nowhere like he was thinking of something that confused him almost every hour. He was most likely born with that look. "It's a tv show," he answered with a short huff through the nose. Buck didn't want to be answering questions; he wanted his questions answered by Eddie. He found himself a little annoyed at the others' interruptions of his interrogation. Hen motions for him to elaborate. "The Mighty Adventures of Dr. Ninja," Buck continued.

"That cartoon?" Hen blurted.

Buck beamed at her knowledge of the show. "You watch it?" He asked, a smile formed on his face.

"No!" Hen chuckled. "Denny does." Her laughter subsided and a thought popped into her head. "You watch it?" Hen accused with surprise in her voice.

Buck glanced at Eddie, who was quietly watching the exchange, then looked back at Hen. "Yes," he almost stammered. Hen instantly started laughing again. "I watch it with Christopher," Buck defended. Hen continued laughing harder now as the image of Buck happily watching a show meant for one under ten came into her mind. "It's a good show. It teaches a lot of important lessons!"

Chimney was coming over now and looked happily confused at Hen's laughter. He wanted to know what he missed so he could laugh that hard too.

Buck sighed and turned his attention back to Eddie. "All I'm wondering is how can Dr. Ninja be king of Wonderel-Land if the old king retires."

"What?" Chimney asked sitting down listening closely to the conversation.

Eddie shrugged again. " I have no idea."

"It just doesn't make any sense," Buck quickly added. "King King has a son."

"King King?" Chimney asked with a light chuckle.

"That's the king of Wonderel-Land's name. It's weird but his son's name is Prince so it seems like a family thing."

Hen's laughter subsided and she was able to compose herself with a large smile that translated everyone else except Buck. Most of the group were holding back their laughter to make sure their ears don't miss a single word that comes out of Buck's mouth. Buck was serious during this entire conversation. This was like the other multiple moments where the team laughed at something about Buck and he didn't find any of it that funny. He wasn't mad though, but that's because he's too interested in getting his answer. Buck's eyes focused on Eddie as he waited.

"I don't know," Eddie repeated after a couple of seconds of intense eye contact. He believed any answer would dismiss Buck's gaze, but he was wrong. Eddie slightly turned his body towards Buck meeting his eyes. "You would have to ask Christopher."

"Or Denny," Hen cut in with a chuckle. "I'll ask him for you."

"Or literally anyone who hasn't reached double digits," Chimney added. Chimney and Hen burst into laughter. Bobby could even be heard chuckling in the kitchen as he pulled out some plates for breakfast. Even Eddie cracked a smile, while Buck's stayed frozen with a hint of frustration.

"Oh ha ha ha," Buck sarcastically now visibly upset at their teasing. He rolled his eyes, turned away from Eddie, and sat back in his chair. Eddie was still smiling at Buck and he felt his eyes. He glanced over and Eddie's grin increase for a second at Buck's attention. "It was an important question!" he defended while the others continued to laugh.

"I know," Eddie spoke softly.

Eddie's smile and voice calmed Buck down and he ignored the laughter directed at him. He looked at Eddie for a second longer taking in as much of his dark brown eyes as he could then shifted away before it would be considered an admiring stare. Buck formed a small smile, looking at his palms in his lap. His hands felt warm but before he could wipe the potential moisture that would form on them on his pants the firehouse siren went off. They were up again on the way to another emergency. Buck's blush was gone.

Their second call was a dance studio fire at Bella's Little Dancing Angels but contrary to the name it did not have adorable tiny humans in tutus and leggings. It was a dance studio for dogs. Dogs could gather and learn to dance with their human. A crazy idea like that turned out to be popular. One of the humans accidentally hit a 'Good Vibe' candle while dancing next to their pug to Snoop Dog and the candle flew on a curtain. The team spent an hour getting the people out and one very scared dog out of the building. The other dogs were a lot faster in reacting to the problem. The humans were blocked by grey smoke and the blaring alarms while most of the dogs ran out.

Bella, the instructor, was the first human out. She came just as the trucks were arriving. Bella loudly coughed with ash in her light brown hair and on her dog print tights and a white t-shirt.

Firefighter rushed in grabbing as many people as they could while hoping not to step on any small dogs. Many humans were reunited with their dogs across the street. A few dogs who weren't taking any chances and kept running. Bella offered free printing on flyers for any lost dogs.

Things were as fine as they could be with everyone out of the building and the fire was being fought until a shriek got the team's attention.

"JoJo!" A heavyset woman cried. She hopped up off a black metal chair that was offered for the people being treated by the restaurant across the street. The woman ran up to the building. Buck step in front of her stopping her.

"Ma'am-" Buck started.

"My dog! I didn't see her come out!" The woman explained barely keeping herself together. "I know she's in there and she's scared! Please!"

Buck looked back at the building with dark gray smoke coming out the windows and ceiling. He turned back to her as tears ran down her face and she tried to push past him again. "I'll get her," Buck told her holding her back. "Go back over there and I'll get her, okay?" he spoke calmly.

The woman nodded and stepped back.

"Cap?!" He hollered and Bobby looked from hoses. "Missing a dog, got to go get it."

"Quickly," Bobby added and Buck ran inside.

It took two minutes of calling for Buck to find the sandy brown bulldog curled up in a corner. Buck scooped her up, trying to soothe the frantic dog as he ran out. Jojo was soon reunited with her owner Joanna. Once Buck got back to his team, he learned that the fire had spread to the two buildings next to it and was very close to a third. Most of his team and other firefighters were evacuating those buildings and the ones next to them. Bobby assigned Buck to help fight the fire with him.

The emergency lasted four hours but right after they were called onto a house fire started by some teenagers who were trying to shoot a rocket into the sky for a science video in their backyard but it blasted into their kitchen. With a tremendously emotional mother, the 118 put the fire. She was angry that there was a large hole in her kitchen wall, she was sad her house was on fire, but the strongest feeling was relief that her children were okay. The house fire lasted half an hour then they were off. The team was at the station for a peaceful twenty minutes when the alarm went off again and they were directed to a drunk driver caused car crash with three other cars.

Their day ended at around eight with the drunk driver being arrested. They walked in the station tiredly. Chimney decided he was too tired to drive so he told the team goodnight. Before anyone could respond Chimney was up the stairs walking to the couches for a power nap. Hen weakly walked to the locker rooms to change and go home to her family. She swayed slightly as she walked and mumbled about dinner. Bobby glared down at his phone and saw a few texts from Athena.

"Harry wanted pizza," He announced to the area not thinking about whether anyone cared. "It's cold now. Guess I'll have to make something when I get there, something small, maybe baked chicken," He sighed thinking out loud. He turned to Buck and Eddie, both of whom were looking at him as if he was talking to them. "Goodnight guys," he gave a slight grin then walked to the locker rooms.

"I need a beer," Buck blurted as he watched Bobby walk away. " I'm tired but I need beer more."

"Today was a long day," Eddie commented wearily looking at Buck in the corner of his eyes. Buck looked back at him. Eddie thought for a second. He wanted to drop onto his cool mushy comforter and float into simple dreams of exploring a cave with a talking rabbit for some reason. Christopher was dropped off at his friend Mason's house by Carla hours ago. The house would be silent and frozen, he could pass out the second his face hit the pillow. He looked at Buck. A drink would be good too. They could drink, sit, and be tired. "Let's go," Eddie answered walking to the locker rooms to get their stuff.

The two of them went to Pearler Bar after they've changed out of their sweaty ash and dirt-covered uniforms. They sat at the bar in brown wooden stools with a good amount cushion on them. The bar was filling up around them. Eddie ordered two light beers from a bartender with a big dirty blonde mustache and beard who rocked his hair in an updo ponytail. The guy slid them over then walked off to help a nervous guy in a suit with a woman not interested in whatever he was telling her as they wait for drinks. Buck and Eddie each took small sips of their beer and glanced around themselves. Their conversation was light. Buck asked about Christopher's sleepover. Eddie told him it was a few boys in Christopher's class having a movie marathon sleepover because Mason's dad got a new large projector. Buck mentioned the little bulldog he saved earlier and the conversation moved to techniques for relaxation since that dog will need to try everything to calm down. Buck said he liked massages while Eddie said he didn't. Eddie gave the reason that he was never completely comfortable with all that touching while he just lays there doing nothing.

"You're not supposed to do anything. You breathe and let the other person un-tense your body. They do all work and you feel amazing," Buck told him.

Eddie shook his head. "No thank you. Baths, " Eddie added to move on from massages. "Warm bubble baths make me feel amazing. I listen to music and forget any troubles." Buck nodded. "Music by itself is good."

"Dancing," Buck added.

"I don't think that dog will be dancing for a while." Eddie laughed as he sipped more of his beer.

"I mean me," Buck grinned. "I dance to shake out all my stress and sometimes sing." Eddie laughed a little louder. "It really helps me." Buck released a few chuckles.

"What do you sing?" Eddie questioned.

Buck sighed not wanting to answer. To him it was embarrassing. Only he, Maddie, and his neighbors knew that answer. Maddie accidentally overheard his private concert and his walls aren't thick enough to shield his neighbors from his attempted high notes. Buck caved and let out another sigh. "I really like Lizzo songs," he admitted. "They're awesome and great to dance to," his shoulders shrugged.

"Yeah?" Eddie smiled nodding along.

"Yes," Buck answered his skin turning a faint pink. "It's not funny." He noticed Eddie holding back laughter.

"Oh I know, not funny." Eddie's smile widens and suddenly they both burst out laughing. "What's your favorite song to sing?" Eddie asked once his laughter stops.

Buck raised an eyebrow. "You listen to Lizzo?" he interrogated.

"I don't live under a rock Buck, maybe I know it."

"Okay," Buck paused. "Truth Hurts."

Eddie let out a laugh. "That's a good song."

"That's a great song," Buck corrected. "Amazing, wonderful, superb song." The two started laughing again and did not stop until a loud noise grabbed their attention from across the bar.

It was the man in the suit and most likely his date. He let out a loud groan while she squinted her eyes at him and slowly shook her head. The woman crossed her arms and walked out of the bar. The man in the suit watched her leave as did half the bar. He dropped his head on the tall table he stood at.

"Really bad first date," Buck commented and Eddie looked back at him.

"Yeah," Eddie nodded processing what just happened.

"Is it weird I'm kind of jealous?" Buck lowered his voice. "Not of the awful of that date but the fact that he had a date." Eddie cracked a smile. Buck sighed. "I haven't had a date in what feels like forever."

"Well if you haven't had a date in forever, then I haven't had one in two forevers."

Buck laughed. "That's not a thing."

"It feels like it," Eddie quickly responded.

"We should be on dates!" Buck blurted pleased with his idea.

Eddie released a long exhale with a slight eye roll. " I can't date. I have Christopher and…" He paused for half a second thinking. "A job; a very demanding job. I'm busy all the time. I don't have time for a relationship.

"You're not busy right now," Buck said raising his eyebrows.

"Yes I am," Eddie stammered. "I'm with you, drinking a beer," he lifted his glass.

"You could be on a date, meeting someone, connecting-" Buck started.

"I don't have time for connecting, I don't have the energy for it," Eddie cut him off. "Why aren't you dating?" he shifted the focus of the conversation.

"I don't know!" Buck shrugged. "I haven't found a person I would like to date," he said slowly letting whatever words that came to him form his excuse. Eddie nodded clearly not believing what was coming out his mouth. "You're right about one thing though." Buck gathered his thoughts. "This job is hard to date with. Hard with serious relationships."

"Yes," Eddie interjected.

"I mean you work with weird schedules and long hours, hard days you know. At first, it's cool and they think it's hot or brave. They want to sleep with you but you're not getting past the first date because they don't want that kind of stress. It's too dangerous for them. They don't get it." Eddie nodded listening and watched Buck sigh. "You don't want to waste your time or theirs," he said disheartened. " I want a relationship, a life outside work, and you guys. I want to date someone who gets my job, but the only people who do are the people that do it. Kind of hard to ask a girl out right before she runs into a fire." Buck sighed again.

"I need someone who likes kids, and who Christopher likes, but they can't meet him until a long time because I can't have someone in his life and they disappear. I have to know they're the one and I don't think I'll find that again. That's a lot of pressure on a first date," Eddie released his own sigh then took a deep breath fight back his sadness. "They have to get the job too," he continued. "They have to be calm. I don't need or want drama in my life. I just want to do my job and raise my son." Eddie bit his lip. "It's getting late," Eddie blurted after a moment.

Buck quickly nodded feeling the thickness in the air. "Yep, I got this one, you'll pay next time."

Eddie stood up and nodded. "I'll see ya," Eddie walked out.

Buck got up and walked to the bartender and paid before leaving.


	3. Chapter 3

Josephine Jessup, or Josie to everyone in her life, a golden brown nine-year-old hopped down her carpeted stairs as she made her way to the kitchen. Her mother, Jodie, stood against the black and white marble counter flipping through a Better Homes magazine as she sipped green tea in a coffee mug covered in sea turtles that Josie made her years ago for Mother's Day. Josie leaped off the one dark wooden step that led to the Kitchen. Her eyes glued to her glittery sneakers that lit up with every step while her thin pink bookbag flew up in the air against her back. The bag dropped back down as her sneakers smacked the floor. The sneakers immediately flashed pink, green, and yellow. Jodie glanced up at her daughter shortly, grinned, then returned her attention to the collection of bright color flowers photographed in an eggshell living room. Josie hopped in place once more to see her sneakers shine.

"Josie, come eat," Jodie told her with a soothing hum in her voice. "We'll have to leave soon." Jodie flipped to the next page and internally gasped at the lime green room with sky blue couches and large sunflowers on almost everything. "Wow," she muttered.

Josie rushed over to the metal stools that were across from her mother and climbed on the seat that had a small white bowl filled with a mixture of cubed fruit. It took a few seconds of struggle to get herself in the stool while trying to keep it steady. Josie was slightly shorter than the average height for her age group and she was the second shortest in her class, 'after Thomas McKay' she'd tell everyone who asked about her age. She pulled herself up panting as she turned herself around so that her bottom was on the seat. Jodie watched her carefully ready to help at any moment while staying frozen to show Josie she believed in her. Jodie released a quiet sigh through her nose as Josie sat properly.

"Mommy, where's Daddy?" Josie asked right before she dropped a piece of watermelon in her mouth.

Jodie looked up from the magazine again and glared at the brightness coming out of the kitchen window. She paused wondering herself. He was gone before she woke up; an unusual action but Jodie had never embraced unnecessary worry. Right as Josie was about to repeat her question, Jodie looked to her. "At work," Jodie revealed a slight smile. "Eat."

Josie nodded and put her attention on her breakfast.

Laurence Jessup shifted in his seat behind the wheel of his black Lexus hybrid. He wiped his face with his palm, removing the light sweat droplets on his face. Laurence turned up the AC to the next two levels and cool air swallowed the car. He leaned back in his seat. The light 'swishing' sound from the vents was drowned out by the old telephone ringtone that blared from his phone. He glanced down at the caller ID and groaned.

"What?" Laurence sighed as he answered.

"I thought you were ignoring me," Elsie Murphy snapped into her car speaker. Her hands held on tight to her tiger print covered steering wheel. She stared furiously at the red light in front of her as if it was going to make the light change faster.

"I was trying to but you keep calling," Laurence partly joked.

"I wouldn't have to keep calling if you'd answer the phone the first time."

"No, you wouldn't have to keep calling, if you'd understand what I'm saying and leave me the hell alone." Laurence lost control of his tone for a second and his voice raised. He stopped himself, taking a deep breath. "Elsie," he started disheartened. "I have a family."

"You hate your wife! You told me that!" Elsie's voice raised. The light turned green. Half a second after it did, she honked at the dirty red car in front of her. "Go! damn it!" She hollered.

"I have a daughter. I owe it to her to make my marriage work," Laurence sighed. He was tired of this conversation already. He explained all of this to Elsie before they even started this secret relationship. He loved his family. He was never going to leave Jodie. Their first time was a lapse in judgment on a long night in the office alone with her. The second was a longer night after going out for drinks with some co-workers at the bar across from their building. He blamed alcohol. On the third, they had given up all self-control they had left and decided to sleep together as many times as they wanted because Jodie was too busy doing the Parent-Teacher Organization work at Josie's school to give him the attention he felt he needed. Elsie was in between relationships and enjoyed the passion that came from a forbidden affair. Laurence was sure he defined exactly what their relationship was, but was now kicking himself at his four-month-long lapse in common sense. 'It wasn't his fault though, Elsie caught feelings' he thought to himself. He had no way of knowing this would happen. That he'd be sneaking around early in the morning dumping his mistress for the third time instead of kissing Josie's forehead before school.

"You owe me, Laurence!" Elsie hollered. "You owe me! You love me! You're just going to throw us away for some bitch you don't even like!" She stammered during the last part putting her words together right before they fell off her tongue. Her hands spoke her anger as she waved one around.

"I don't love you, Elsie." Laurence tried to stay calm.

"Liar!" Elsie snapped. "You said you loved me multiple times! You can't just do this."

Laurence groaned. "We're done." He didn't want to hear anymore. He didn't want to go back and forth with Elsie, not for the third time. Their relationship was supposed to be drama free; just sex and compliments. Elsie had promised no drama and even made him promise not to fall for her. They had both laughed at that when they first got together. It was a running gag throughout their romance. He did mess that up though when he said he loved her during a romantic night time call. Laurence was distracted during that moment and did not realize what he said until she said she loved him too. It was the only time he has ever said he loved her. He never said 'love you too' to any of the twenty-three times she said it to him. He would hang up right after the love or sit there silently until the subject was changed if they were in person. He did not love her and he was not going to waste energy pretending he did. His 'I love you' was a mistake, but thinking about it now, their whole relationship was one big mistake. "Goodbye, Elsie." Laurence hung up the phone after the words left his lips. He left out a deep exhale. He knew this was not over. He knew Elsie. Even before their romance, he knew Elsie was a determined woman. To Elsie, a no was a yes that required a different method. He admired that about Elsie. In the office, she worked her ass off to show anything is possible with her leading it. Whenever they had deep conversations during their affair, which was rare, Elsie would talk about her childhood and how she's had to work hard for everything in life. She was raised in a foster home with parents who never thought about feeding their kids and forgot school is every day except for weekends during the fall. Elsie was an independent woman who took no shit. It was hot in a conference meeting, kind of hot in the bedroom, but now it was the thing he hated most about her. Laurence knew this conversation would be repeated. As much as he hated talking to her, it was not the worst case in this scenario. The worst-case would be involving his family, but he knew Elsie would not do that.

Elsie heard the beep that Laurence ended the call and screamed. "God damn it!" She pounded on her steering wheel, the horn sounding on and off. "God fucking damn it!" She screamed pulling over to the side of the busy street. She hit her steering wheel harder, bruising her hands. Elsie felt her palms sting but she continued. For a split second, she imagined the wheel was Laurence's face as she beat it, then it turned into Jodie's. The only time Elsie saw Jodie in person was at a Christmas party at the office. Elsie and Laurence just officially started sleeping together. Elsie believed it was funny that she was screwing her husband and Jodie had no idea. It was like 'guess what I do with your husband when you're home alone in bed missing him.' Elsie had a big smirk for the whole party. Laurence tried to keep them separated but Jodie wanted to meet as many people as possible. Jodie was extra friendly to everyone. When Jodie told her Laurence talks very positively about her, Elsie exchanged a look of mockery with Laurence. Now as Elsie thought back to it all she remembered was how beautiful Jodie looked in a dark green dress and a small amount of makeup. Jodie was kind to a stranger; a stranger sleeping with her husband. Elsie let out another scream completely ignoring the herd of people looking at her. She punched and slapped the steering wheel harder until a snapping sound and a piercing pain stopped her. She looked down at a broken nail on a finger that was spotting blood. A small amount of blood dripped on her grey pants. Elsie slammed down on her pedal, almost hitting someone as she turned back into the lane. She speeded down streets as honking cars were in her rearview.

Elsie pushed herself out of her car and stomped to her trunk. She yanked it opened and pulled out a medium-sized red gasoline container that she kept for emergencies. She looked at the Jessup house; the perfect American home with a white picket fence and a tree with pink flowers in the front yard. 'Fuck him, fuck this, fuck everything', she thought huffing through her nose as she marched to the house. Elsie walked to the side of the house passing the grey minivan with stickers of a father, mother, and daughter on the back window. She went to the electrical panel on the side of the house. Elsie dumped all of the gasoline on the panel, then pulled out a green lighter with a small grin on her face. "Not so perfect anymore she muttered staring at the small flame. She pushed it on the panel then jumped back. It burst into flames, the bright orange shinning in Elsie's eyes. The fire climbed up the side of the house looking for a way inside. Sparks dropped onto the grass and Elsie froze. 'What did I do?' she questioned losing her blinding rage. The fire wrapped around the house in seconds. Elsie snapped back to reality when she heard a shriek. Her head darted to the source.

It was an old heavyset woman across the street in a knitted dark blue sweater. The woman slapped her hands to her cheeks as she screamed. "Fire!" She hollered spinning around in a panic as she flailed her arms around almost like a bird trying to fly as her shoulder-length snow-white hair hit her face.

Elsie looked back at the house. "It's on fire", she realized. "It's really on fire." Elsie gasped. "What did I do?" she pleaded with herself for information. She could not have done this. Guilt and regret hit her like a truck. She held back tears. Another shriek got her attention again, but this one was coming from inside the house. Her mouth parted in shock. "What did I do?!" "Someone call 9-1-1!" Elsie screamed to the neighbors who were all coming out of their homes to see.

The Fire Truck sirens blared as it and an ambulance sped down the residential street. The 118 hopped out of the truck. The fire reached the roof of the house and screams roared from inside. Each member was given their assignment when they rode in the truck. Buck and Hen rush to the hose.

"Ready!" Hen shouted, holding a tight grip on part of the large dirty beige hose standing beside the truck with one hand hovering over the black covered metal knob waiting for the clear from her team that she should pull on it.

"Ready!" Buck hollered back holding on to the end of the hose pointing it at the house.

Hen gave a short nod then cranked it on. The flatten hose immediately started filling up. Buck's grip tightened, not letting the new power of the hose take control. He pulled the lever at the end of the hose toward him and water burst out. He planted his boots firm on the concrete to ensure the hose would not push him back. Hen moved a couple feet closer to Buck, helping him keep it steady. They sprayed the front of the Jessup house as dark smoke floated to the blue sky.

Bobby watched them, then marched to the other end of truck. He pulled on the walky talky next to his right shoulder against his heavy jacket. His head turned so he could speak into it without having to take it off. "Eddie, Chim, you see anyone yet?" He asked. Eddie and Chim ran into the house right when Buck splashed the front door. There was silence for a couple seconds and Bobby impatiently waited for an update stopping himself from asking again. He opened is mouth to call on them again when Chimney's voice was on the other end.

"Nothing yet Cap" Chimney informed. Bobby could hear him calling out on the radio. "Where are you?!" Chimney yelled with Eddie behind him. The fire had engulfed the living room and the white stairs. Family photos quickly burned into ash. There was a strong burning of wood smell. The two maneuvered with skill, avoiding furniture and burning debris. The cries for help were their answers.

"Straight ahead!" Eddie yelled behind his mask. He took the lead pushing passed a fallen lamp and some books. Eddie dropped down into the kitchen almost losing his balance. He regained himself and saw through the dark smoke an outline of a person. The screams rang in their ears. Whoever was in the house was in this room. Eddie followed the cries. His vision was improving the closer he got until he saw a woman with a small child bundled in her arms next to a running sink. The child hid her face in the crook of the woman's neck and the woman had her shirt over her nose and mouth. "LAFD!" Eddie announced walking up to the girls. "Come on ma'am, let's get you guys out." Eddie put a hand on the woman's free shoulder and she quickly nodded.

"Cap, we got them," Chimney said into his walky-talky. Chimney heard Bobby say something like hurry out and his attention went back to Eddie and the woman. "Is there anyone else in the house?" Chimney asks the woman. Both Chim and Eddie look at the woman who looks confused like she didn't hear them.

"No!" she finally yelled back after making out what he asked her.

"Let's Go!" Chimney repeated leading them. Eddie is behind the woman and child helping push them through the house. An enormous piece of wood from the floor above them falls on the burning green couch next to them. The impact creates a loud crash and the little girl starts crying holding on her mother tighter. Eddie can sort of see the girl's face. He sees her tears drop on her mother's blouse and skin. His heartaches, but turns his sadness for the girl into determination. He has to get this girl and her mother out of this house and away from this danger.

"Faster Chim!" Eddie yelled up toward the front. Chimney was over other fallen floorboards avoiding the flames that shined on top of a few. Eddie picked up his pace as Chimney picked up his. The crackling of fire became drowned out in Eddie's ear by the woman's voice.

"Josie, everything will be okay, these guys will help us. Good people help people remember." The woman said, directed to the girl in her arms. The woman pushed the girl closer against her. "Hush my love, my soul, my heart. I knew right from the start. When I heard your first breath. That every time you rest, every beat of your heart, every little breath, you would be mine. My sweet little thing. No matter what comes. No matter how big my little thing gets. No matter where you are. No matter when you're happy or sad. No matter if the sun never shines again and the stars hide forever. No matter if a beat is silent and a breath slows down. You will be my love, my soul, my heart." The woman gently sang. Josie's weak voice could be heard as she followed her mother saying 'my love, my soul, my heart.' The woman said it with such ease as each word sounded soft and comforting coming from her lips. This had to be their song, Eddie thought. It was a beautiful song. The song got Josie to stop crying. The woman hummed after she sang the words, holding Josie tighter.

Chimney burst through the door of smoke that built where the front door was as smoke came out every hole in the house. He stepped out of the house feeling the bright sunlight hit him. All of them followed him away from the house. Buck and Hen were spraying the hose on the side of the house now. Chimney turned back to Eddie and the woman. "They should get checked out," Chimney said to Eddie. Eddie nodded in agreement.

"We're out" the mother said tiredly with a hint of cheer. Her balance got shaky as the energy she had in the house began to disappear and relief hit her shoulders. The woman's eyes slowly shut and she fell over. Eddie instantly grabbed the little girl from the mother's loose grip and Chimney grabbed the woman trying to keep her up.

"Mommy!" the little girl cried reaching out for her. Eddie held her back.

"We need a gurney!" Chimney hollered toward the truck and another 118 firefighter rushed over pushing one. With the firefighter's help, Chimney got the woman on it. Chimney put an oxygen mask on the woman and pushed her to the ambulance. Eddie followed with the girl in his arms.

"Your mommy just needs some air," Eddie reassures the girl. Tears are falling from the girl's big brown eyes, staining her puffy cheeks. Eddie knew the girl needed her song right now. She needed her mother to be okay and for her to sing to her. Eddie told the girl things were going to be okay, but he could tell she did not believe him. She would only believe that from her mother. Her mother's eyes were still shut as she breathed in fresh oxygen. Chimney noticed a burn on the mother's left arm that neither of them saw in the house. Eddie gave the girl her own oxygen mask. After a few seconds of convincing her the mask was safe, she allowed him to put it on her face. Eddie looked around and realized two police cars were at the scene. Athena was talking to Bobby with black sunglasses on her face.

A black car sped down the street creaking as it came to a stop on the other side of the street. A man in a grey suit flew out of the car getting everyone's attention. He ran towards the house screaming, but Bobby and Athena got in his way.

"This is my house!" the man cried. The man tried shoving passed them but Bobby as gently as he could push the man back. The man looked over Bobby's shoulder and saw the minivan in the driveway. He shoved harder. "My wife and daughter are in there!" Bobby grabbed onto the man trying to calm him down but the man was too loud to talk to. "The van! They're here!" The man panted losing control.

"Sir calm down!" Bobby exclaimed fearful the man would have a panic attack. "We got everyone out of the house! Your wife and daughter are over there!" Bobby pointed towards the ambulance.

The man's crying ceased as his eyes followed Bobby's index finger. He pushed himself away from Bobby and ran towards Eddie and Chimney.

Chimney was too busy wrapping the mother's burned arm to notice the man approaching him. He cleaned all visible debris from her burn but she would have to go to the hospital to make sure he got it all. Chimney pulled out small chunks of ash, wood, and other small bits of material. He tried to avoid the burned skin, but with the burn covering her outer forearm, there was too much skin to avoid. He heard her wince in pain a couple of times. It was a good side that she was a conscience, but with every whine, Josie cried. Chimney finished wrapping her arm with four layers of a white bandage wrap just as the woman sat up. "Slow down" Chimney quickly directed, helping her up. The woman reached to take off the mask but Chimney pressed it back against her face. "Just breathe." Chimney glanced over at Eddie. Eddie was struggling to keep Josie in his arms. Josie fought to get out of Eddie's arms and into her mother's. The woman looked at Chimney. She said something under the mask but it was too muffled to understand. The woman looked back at her daughter and reached for her as tears fell down her cheeks. Eddie handed Josie over to her mother then stepped back. The woman gently swayed Josie in her lap.

"Jodie!" The man called as he rushed to her side. "Josie!" he smiled in relief. The three of them hugged while each other's tears fell on each other. The man pulled back for a second breaking their hug. "Are you two okay?" he questioned examining them. Jodie nodded. He saw her bandaged arm. "Are you sure?" he asked looking at her arm. He picked her arm up and she winced from the pressure. He apologized immediately setting her arm on the gurney.

"We're okay, Laurence, " Jodie spoke quietly as she pulled off her mask. Laurence stroked her dark brown hair and placed a soft kiss on her hairline. She leaned into his touch with Josie hugging her chest. They were silent for a second, savoring the fact that they were okay. None of them looked towards their house. They smelt it burning. They could hear the water trying to save it. They held each other close ignoring their burning home. The family's silence lasted for almost a minute when the peace was disrupted. Laurence felt a stare directed towards him. At first, he believed it to be one of the many neighbors he saw surrounded across his house when he first pulled up, but the stare felt like it was the same eyes on him for a while. They seemed more powerful than a pity stare that he believed his neighbors were giving them. He opened his eyes and turned his head. Elsie was staring at him from the middle of the street. Her face looked blank and she didn't react when their eyes met. He broke away from Jodie and Josie and started stomping over to Elsie. He heard Jodie call for him but ignored her.

"You did this!" he yelled, his face turning a light red with anger. His hands shaped into fists. "You tried to murder my family!" He screamed coming up to her. Laurence had fallen into his emotions. He grabbed Elsie's arm squeezing it. He ignored her yelps of pain and his redding palms. "You did this!" he shook her. Before he could process it, Eddie was pulling him off her and three cops, one being Athena.

"What is going on over here?" Athena questions looking at Laurence. Another officer replaces Eddie's restrain on him with his own.

"She did this!" Laurence motioned to the house. Buck and Hen had got almost all of the fire out and were now just splashing smoke.

"What makes you think that?"

"She did this to get back at me!" Laurence snapped.

Athena took a breath. He didn't answer her question. She looked at the woman noting the paleness in her face. The woman had grass stains on her grey 1-inch mary janes and the hemp of her pants. "Ma'am?" Athena asked. The woman didn't move. She was frozen in shock. Athena examined the woman some more. "What's your name?" No answer. The woman was traumatized. Athena wondered if it was the fire or Laurence grabbing her. "I need to know your name," Athena spoke carefully stepping in front of her. She locked eyes with the woman, but the woman did not react. She slowly waved a finger in her eyes seeing if they would move but got nothing.

"Her name is Elsie Murphy!" Laurence answered with frustration in his tone.

Athena glanced back at the man. She needed Elsie to answer. She needed a reaction from Elsie. Any kind of movement. Athena looked over at Officer Stevens who held on to Laurence's shoulder keeping him away. They locked eyes and she gave a slight nod towards Laurence. Officer Stevens got the message and pulled out his handcuffs.

"You're under arrest," Officer Stevens had a deep voice as he spoke with a stern tone. He grabbed Laurence's wrist and pulled them behind his back.

Laurence instantly flinched and tried to pull away. "What? You should be arresting her!" He hollered. "She tried to kill my family! I didn't do anything!"

Jodie straightened up. "What?" she questioned looking to Chimney.

"You assaulted this woman," Officer Stevens told him. Laurence struggled more and Stevens hold got stronger. "Do not resist." He started saying the Miranda rights.

Athena's head shot back to Elsie when she heard her mutter something. "What?"

"I didn't mean to," Elsie murmured.

Athena moved closer listening carefully. Elsie repeated over and over getting louder each time. "Mean what?" Athena asked. She looked at the Jessup house. "You set the house on fire."

It was more a statement than a question. Elsie looked her in the eyes, this time she saw her instead of through her. Elsie burst into tears. Athena sighed. "You're under arrest." Athena turned her around and pulled out her handcuffs. They snapped onto Elsie's wrist with a little space for Elsie to move them within the cuffs but not enough for them to pass her hands.

"We love each other," Elsie cried. "I just love him."

"Yeah yeah," Athena groaned telling Elsie her rights.

Laurence was struggling to get away from Stevens as he was guided to the car. "That Bitch tried to kill my family!" he yelled.

"We love each other!" Elsie screamed towards Jodie. "He loves me! He's been saying it for months!" Athena pulled her to her swat car.

Jodie and Laurence looked at each other after she said that. "Months?" Jodie asked quietly. She gagged realizing their affair. Her stomach felt sickeningly empty as her insides felt ruined. Jodie put a palm on her face letting it catch her tears. She wanted to scream but her throat felt broken. It seemed like all of the air in her lungs was gone and she couldn't get more. She felt a cool metal against her face. Jodie pulled her hand back and saw her glistening silver band wedding ring with a fingernail size diamond on it. She gasped for air. Her body trembled. Jodie's hand was tainted. The ring made her feel dirty. It was poisoning her. She needed to get it far away from her. Her right-hand fingers shook as she pulled her ring off. Jodie threw the ring and it clacked against the pavement. She turned to Chimney. "I- I wanted t-tt-to leave now!" she muttered. Chimney nodded and he and another firefighter pulled her up into the ambulance.

"Jodie! Jodie!" Laurence screamed as Stevens pushed him in the car. "Jodie Please!"

Chimney shut the back of the ambulance and sat down beside Jodie and Josie. Right after the doors shut Jodie burst into tears. Hen got in the front and they drove off. Laurence and Elsie were put into two separate police cars. Laurence yelled in the back of his while Elsie cried. Eddie walked up to Bobby and Buck, who were securing the hose.

"Dang," Buck spoke quietly. Bobby silently got in the truck. Buck looked at Eddie with spots of sadness and confusion in those normally gleefully big blue eyes. Eddie had to agree that was a lot for their first call of the day.

"Lust makes people stupid and love gets people hurt," Eddie spoke bluntly trying to give Buck some kind of explanation foolishly thinking it would make him feel better. The way it came out though sounded harsh even to his own ears. Buck directed his sadness to Eddie. He felt bad for him. Eddie released a huff. He really didn't need that. Not this early, not from Buck. Anyone but Buck.


End file.
